Northwest Hunters: The End of Evil
Chapter Four: Adjustments to Being Home
Junie peered excitedly out the window, her eyes drinking in the familiar sight of her home. The trip to Portland had taken less than four days, but it had seemed like forever. Her heart jumped when she saw her Master walking out to meet them as they pulled the SUV into the garage.
Bob pulled open the driver’s door and gathered Donna into his arms; he held her tight and rocked back and forth. His eyes found Junie’s and he smiled over Donna’s head and beckoned for her to come out of the car. “Come here, girl, I missed you too.”
Oblivious to the fact that she was nude from the waist down, Junie jumped out of the car and skipped around the car and slipped inside his embrace. She giggled as she felt his hand sliding across her bare ass cheeks. Bob’s voice rumbled deep in her ears, “You seem to be missing something, my sweet Junie.”
“I am just following my Mistress’s instructions.”
“Have you been a good girl for your Mistress?”
“I did my best, but some of it was really hard.”
Donna interrupted, “She did do her best. And now I want to give her back to you.”
Junie turned in Bob’s arms, her face only inches from Donna’s, her voice was stricken, “Ma’am, I don’t understand. Don’t you want to be my Mistress anymore?”
Donna smiled and spoke softly, “Oh, my sweet little Junie, I promise to always be your Mistress, but I feel the need to somehow find shelter in our Master’s arms.”
Bob gave them a squeeze, “Come, now is not the time. We will explore this further later.” He gave Junie a sharp smack on her naked bottom. “Get your pants on, girl, and help unload this car.”
Junie was busy unloading the car and then unpacking their suitcases for a while, but she was very aware that Bob and Donna were deep in conversation on the front deck. Repeatedly she found excuses for her chores to bring her through the front room where she could pause briefly and look out at them. Bob sat and held Donna close, listening as Donna talked and talked. At one point Junie gasped in concern when she saw that her Mistress’s face was wet with tears.
Junie’s mind was a swirl of questions and nervous worry when she heard Bob’s voice calling her to come out onto the front deck. Donna was standing up, her eyes were red and swollen from crying, but her face and voice were calm, “Junie, as you are well aware, your Master and I have been talking.”
Junie nodded uncertainly. “Yes, Ma’am.”
“Good girl, I want you to help me with something. I want to formally return you to your Master. I feel the need of ritual, so please take off your clothing and kneel.”
Junie quickly began to undress and was a little startled when she saw Donna doing the same thing. When she was nude she quickly knelt and Donna knelt down beside her. Donna took her hand and gripped it softly, “Master, I bring you back our girl. She performed all her duties to the best of her abilities and repeatedly exceeded my expectations while she was in my care. You have every reason to be proud and reward her. But I found the task of being her Mistress without your guidance to be at odds to my happiness. It is one thing to play at being a Mistress under your careful control, but it was too much for me to do this far from you. I languished without the shelter of your strength and love. I beg you to take this away from me. I beg you to take Junie back and I also beg you to take me back as well so that we may both find joy as your slaves and your servants.”
Junie could not look away from Donna’s face as she was speaking. Instinctively she did not speak, but a wave of protest was rising up in her. There was a growing feeling that somehow she had failed Donna, that if somehow she had done better then Donna would not be saying these words. Her mouth opened and then shut.
Bob’s words were gentle and loving. “My goddess, I joyfully accept you as my slave and my servant and I welcome back my girl back into the shelter of my love.” He reached down and lifted both of them to their feet. “For now, my sweet girls, I want you both to remain naked as a symbol of your servitude. Junie, I want you to go make dinner. I missed your cooking. Donna, I want you to spend some time alone and think about what you would ask of me to help you find your balance once more.”
As Junie was making dinner, Bob sat at the table. “Donna told me all about your trip. You did a good job. She is confident you will do a good job when it is time for you to testify. So, little one, what do you wish as a reward for trying so hard?”
Junie looked at him in confusion. “Um… I don’t know. Master, what is happening?”
Bob smiled gently, “You sense the sadness and imbalance in Donna’s spirit.”
“I’m sorry. I tried really hard. I don’t know what I did wrong.”
Bob paused and looked confused for a few minutes. Then he asked, “Junie, are you thinking that this has something to do with you?”
“Doesn’t it? She said she was unhappy being my Mistress.”
“Only because she could not find balance, without me there to help keep her equilibrium between us she began to feel unstable. It was like being on the high wire without a net. She began to fear falling. It was not you, Junie. It was her role.” Bob stood and walked into the kitchen and put his hands on Junie’s shoulders, turning her to face him. “Do you remember me telling you not so long ago that Donna must find her place balancing between us?”
“Yes, Master.”
“This trip to Oregon with you in much deeper submission to her has thrown her off balance. The more she controlled you, the less in control she began to feel. As her dominant side grew stronger to meet your needs, the more she lost touch with her submission to me. She found herself out of harmony. She began to feel afraid and that let her become more vulnerable to the negative emotions of hate and rage. You know all too well the sense of safety and peace that comes from your submission. Donna misses those feelings. The more she dominated you the more she wanted to be in your place. I expect her to ask for that from me when she returns from her time alone.”
Junie struggled to listen to Bobs words. She tried to understand Donna’s need, but she could not free herself from the feeling that somehow she was losing something, that she was being abandoned. Her thoughts were in chaos and questions.
“I don’t know what to do. Will she still be my Mistress?” Finally she let her fears come to voice, “I don’t want to lose her.”
Bob gave her a little shake. “Again, Junie, I will say, this is not about you. It is about what Donna needs. She will continue to be your Mistress, but she will be exploring her own submission. You will not lose her, but she may not be your source of strength and refuge for a period of time. You will need to rely on me for that.”
Junie leaned against his chest, “Master, if it was not me, why do I feel so guilty and frightened?”
“Those are answers you need to find inside yourself. But as you seek those answers I will give you another question. What is it you are really afraid of losing?”
Junie stiffened at his words and the sound of the front door opening. For some reason she could not lift her face from her Master’s chest, she sensed a deep reluctance to look upon her Mistress’s face. Not only was she afraid of what she might see there, but, to her horror, she felt an inexplicable wave of resentment. Pulling herself out of his arms, Junie stammered, “I… um… have to check the laundry,” and fled downstairs.
Junie stood looking at herself in the mirror in her bathroom, out loud she asked herself, “What is it you are afraid of losing?” She vigorously washed her face and combed her hair. Looking sternly at the face in the mirror she gave herself an order, “Junie, you have duties. You have a Master and a Mistress that are waiting for their dinner. Suck it up and get your lazy ass in gear, girl.”
Forcing her face into a calm expression she marched herself up the stairs. Donna was sitting still and silent on the floor at Bob’s feet as he sat at the table. He was speaking softly, “…only for as long as it is good for our circle.” He looked up and nodded to Junie, “How much longer until our dinner is ready?”
“Not long, maybe twenty minutes.”
“Good, while you are cooking you will listen without speaking. Like I expected, Donna has requested to experience her submission more profoundly. I have agreed to do this on a time-limited basis, only so long as it does not disrupt our circle. For now she will speak only with me. Your duties will be to continue with your obedience and devotion to both of us, but you will only communicate with me.”
Again Junie felt a rush of grief and anger. Pressing her lips together, she nodded. Her voice was brisk, “Yes, Master.” She busied herself putting the few finishing touches on their dinner, careful to keep her face averted as much as possible. Junie knew that her feelings were clear in her eyes, but the more she tried to control them, the more they seemed to bubble and seethe in her heart.
When Junie began to set the table, Bob casually reached for Donna’s plate and moved it from its usual place to the floor, putting it down next to the silent still form of Donna as she huddled at his feet. Again a pang of resentment shot through Junie, she stood uncertainly with the silverware in her hands, and then very carefully put Donna’s down at her usual place at the table. If Bob wanted Donna to eat with a knife and fork he could give them to her himself.
Junie finished setting the table and sat down. She looked uncertainly at Bob. Always before dinner had been a time where conversation flowed easily, table manners were informal, everyone serving themselves. The only formal acknowledgement of their relationship was their careful attention to Bob’s comfort. It was unspoken, but both she and Donna made sure he was served first and they always waited until he was eating before they took their first bite. Now Donna’s place seemed conspicuously empty and Junie suddenly felt adrift.
It suddenly occurred to Junie how much of her day to day actions were dictated by Donna. It had become an almost unconscious, wordless connection. A thousand times a day, she would find herself looking up and reading her Mistress’s face for guidance, for approval, or just for the reassurance of knowing she was there to turn to. Now her Mistress was beyond reach.
Bob spoke up in an easy tone, “So, Junie, tell me about Monica. What is she like? How did that go?” He dished up his plate, and began to carefully cut up all the food into bite sized pieces.
Junie watched him cutting the food on his plate and spoke in a distracted tone, “Um… she is little. She is not very tall and really thin. She seems like she spends a lot of her time being sad. She was a little uncomfortable at first, but she fell in love with Happy at first sight.” Her tone began to warm with the memory. “When she smiles she really is a pretty girl.”
Bob picked up his plate and, leaning over, scraped the food off onto Donna’s plate, and then served himself again. “Donna mentioned that she was satisfied that Happy was going to be well taken care of. So how are you feeling about your trip to the courthouse?”
Junie reached for the serving dish of stuffed peppers and began to serve herself. She spoke in a soft monotone, carefully skirting the topic of feelings, “It’s a courthouse, the rooms are smaller and more modern than I expected. I guess I watched too much Perry Mason reruns as I was growing up. But it pretty much looks like I expected. The assistant prosecuting attorney, Lurleena Benson, was nice. The main prosecuting attorney seems kind of in a hurry, but I expect he is pretty busy. Agent Durant was there.”
She tried to keep her eyes on her own plate and her Master. Junie could not see Donna from where she was sitting, but was very aware that she was there hidden by the edge of the table and her Master’s legs. The silverware was still sitting unused at Donna’s place on the table and Junie knew she was being forced to eat with her fingers. In her mind she could see her Mistress leaning over the plate, picking up the food with her fingers. Junie cringed as she thought about the fresh tomato sauce, rich with olive oil and herbs that the stuffed peppers had baked in and the couscous side dish. Neither dish lent themselves readily to being eaten by hand.
Bob chuckled, “Ah yes, our old friend, Agent Durant. Donna mentioned that you ate lunch together. Was he nice this time?”
Junie did not feel the slightest bit like laughing, “He was really nice. He did not have to be there. He took the time to be there to help me feel more comfortable.” She picked half heartedly at her dinner. “Monica likes him a lot.”
Bob ate with gusto, “Good dinner, Junie, thank you. The food you left for me in the fridge was good, but somehow it is just better with you here.”
Junie wondered how he could act so normal when everything felt all wrong. “Thank you, I am glad to be home.” The words felt false and bitter in her mouth, nothing felt right and she wanted to scream at him for being so stupid for not seeing it. Each minute passing seemed like an hour and Junie found herself willing her Master to please eat faster so that she could at least find refuge in the routines of cleaning up after dinner.
Junie was buried so deep in her struggle to hide her growing distress that Bob’s voice made her jump, “Donna will come with me to take the dogs for a walk. You clean up in here. We will be back soon. There is a lot more than just your good cooking I missed.” His eyes boldly caressed her naked form.
Donna moved silently and kept her eyes lowered as she followed Bob out the front door. All four Golden Retrievers were on the porch waiting, eager for their nightly walk. Junie watched the group move across the lawn and into the woods. A soft gulping sob rose up in her chest and she gasped and shook herself, again admonishing herself, “Suck it up.” Turning to her duties she buried herself in the safety of cleanliness and order, making sure the kitchen was spotless, deciding what to cook for meals tomorrow and getting out the ingredients.
Once things were all in order she got out her computer and checked her emails. There was the usual short message from Tammi talking about school and another from Monica.
Dear Junie,
I can’t begin to describe how amazed and delighted I was to realize that it was you knocking on my door this Friday morning. I had been sitting on the couch trying to figure out one good reason to get dressed and there was this knocking and I looked out the window and at first I thought you had to be some solicitor or religious person looking to preach at me. When you said it was you, I was so surprised I couldn’t even think there for a minute. You could have knocked me over with a feather.
There are not words enough to say how wonderful and fantastic and stupendous and generous and kind it was for you to do this amazing thing and give me this wonderful gift of this Happy puppy. THANK YOU!!!!!!!
Happy is doing great. She all the time tries to get my old dog to play. She will do that bow down thing where she puts her chest on the ground and raises her butt up and barks. He just ignores her, but I can tell he is starting to perk up a little just from having her around. Maybe a little youthful enthusiasm is just what he needed to get his blood flowing again. My mom loves, absolutely loves, her. She was a little mad at first, not about the puppy, just from me having someone over that she hadn’t preapproved. In fact, it was Happy that melted her heart. We fight over who gets to hold her sometimes. Luckily she is a sensible puppy and demands to be put down so she can run around and play too. If she didn’t, we would probably spoil her rotten.
David stopped by on Sunday to visit. He mentioned that he had lunch with you on the day before, that he saw you at the courthouse. He told me you were going to be testifying too. I guess we are not supposed to talk about it, but he did say we could still be friends and support each other. I guess that means you will be coming down here during the trial. I hope we can maybe see each other some of the time. You could see Happy and we can hold each other’s hands.
I am doing my best to be brave. David said he was going to be here during the whole trial and just knowing he will be here is the one thing that keeps me from going completely crazy with nervousness. It seems like when he is around all the terror just goes away.
Write me back and tell me how the rest of your trip went. I bet you are happy to be home.
Love,
Monica
When she read the last sentence Junie felt that same wave of emotion. It was a mind numbing mix of rage and grief and she, for the life of her, could not figure out why it felt like she was losing something. Bob had been completely accurate when he had asked her what she thought she was losing. She knew it had everything to do with Donna stepping back from her role as her Mistress, but for the life of her she could not figure out why it was so hard to deal with. She told herself that Donna was not leaving and Bob had said it was just for a while; it wasn’t like Donna was dead or anything.
Taking a deep breath Junie wrote back to Monica.
Dear Monica,
It was nice to find such a nice letter waiting for me in my mailbox. You are right, I am happy to be home.
I did not talk to you about me testifying because I wasn’t sure if it was okay to tell you that. I am really nervous about having to do that. I do not do well in public places and the idea of having to sit up in front of a group of people and answer questions makes me feel totally panicked.
Lurleena Benson is the assistant prosecuting attorney that is working with me and she has been really helpful. It was a relief to see a familiar face at the courtroom when they were letting me see what it would be like. There was a time when I think that seeing Agent Durant would have made me want to turn around and walk the other direction, but now, after seeing him through your eyes, I just wanted to throw my arms around him.
You take care and give that Happy puppy a hug and a kiss from me.
Love,
Junie
Junie sent a copy of the emails to Donna and mailed off the letter to Monica. As she pushed ‘send’, she wondered when Donna would have a chance to read them and again felt a wave of sadness.
The hardest thing was the only person she could have spoken to about these feelings was Donna. Somehow the idea of turning to her Master with this distress, this childlike sense of abandonment and loneliness, was out of the question.
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